Thread:BeyonderGod/@comment-61022-20140530153329/@comment-61022-20140604065613

BeyonderGod wrote: I BeyonderGod of the Marvel/Dc Database Community would like to for the 2nd time apologize to Nausiated for my inappropriate behavior more importantly for my foul language toward him and his personal life since he is a Admin which is a high rank position that deserves respect for Registered or Non-Registered members.

Okay, first of all you are missing the point of the apology you're supposed to be making. Apologizing simply because you said those things to an admin is not exactly a sincere way to make an apology. You're missing the point. I also said I wasn't asking for a direct apology, I asked that you apologize to the community.

Most importantly, '''I don't deserve respect because I am admin. I deserve respect because I am a human being. In fact you should be treating everyone on this wiki with the same amount of respect'''. If you're apologizing because I am in a position of authority only, you are wholly missing the point. The key issue was not that you were insulting an admin, you were insulting another person.

The fact that you see this as insulting a person in authority only is entirely missing the point.

BeyonderGod wrote: I also apologize for the 3rd time for my improper grammar in my last apologize and I am hoping to be a responsible contributor to the Forum's and the Pages that go along with them.

You weren't asked to apologize for your improper grammar and punctuation. You were asked to take the extra care to ensure that what you were writing was legible.

BeyonderGod wrote: I am also apologizing to the other Administrator's of the Marvel Database Community for starting a pointless debate over fictional character's that has nothing to do with the wikia or to any of there pages.

We weren't asking you to apologize for "pointless debating". In fact the entire debate in question is regardless of the issue. It doesn't matter if the perspective of the debate was is irrelevant. Yes, during the course of the debate I asked you to use proper grammar, cite references, and explain yourself more clearly, but that has absolutely nothing to do with why you were banned and why you have been asked to apologize.

The any correlation between that debate and your apologies are the similar poor spelling and grammar. However, whereas in the forum it was a point of personal contention, I have asked that you use proper grammar and punctuation to show you are putting some effort in asking for forgiveness. I didn't ask for you to apologize for your previous poor grammar, I was hoping you would display more care an attention to what you are saying to show that you have some genuine meaning, instead of coming off like you rushed an apology to try and appease people.

BeyonderGod wrote: I BeyonderGod will also like to apologize to Jamie the founder of the wikia for strictly annoying him over such a useless problem that could have been talked out though other way's like the talk pages.

I can't really speak for Jamie on this one, but this is kind of outside of the whole main point of why I asked you to make an apology.

BeyonderGod wrote: I will not in anyway lose my temper in any other situation similar or close to the problem that caused Nausiated to get out his busy schedule to stop and commenting for me for absolutely no reason then to correct my own mistakes that I have made to my apology earlier.

Not losing your temper is a good start. However that whole last chunk is a huge run on sentence and on top of that it comes off as incredibly sarcastic. If you think the entire point of you making this apology is so I don't feel like I'm "wasting my time" and have to correct everything you say, then you are completely off base and once again missing the entire point.

The reason why I am making you do this properly is to see if you have any sort of understanding of why what you said was wrong, and you it was inappropriate to say those things. But I'll get into that more in a moment...

BeyonderGod wrote: So I sincerely hope he will take this apologize and that in anyway possible take this as a joke I am hoping to make this small problem in the literal archives hoping it won't be resurfaced in any future arguments or Debates.

So in summation what I am getting from your entire apology is this:

Point One: You're sorry because you swore and insulted an administrator only because he is in a position of authority and because that is the only reason why you should show him any sort of respect.

Again, you shouldn't be apologizing and showing me respect because I am an admin. Outside of me being the target of your abusive language and having the power to ban you for doing so, that has absolutely nothing to do with any reason why you should be apologizing to me. As I've pointed out countless times is that the reason why its a big deal is have a zero harassment and foul language policy. As I've outlined many times, while what you said didn't upset or insult me personally, I told you that you needed to apologize to the community for that language. Because my view was that if you were going to use that sort of language at me, you were going to use it on anyone, and not everyone is as impervious to insults as I am.

This is a monumentally important thing because of the community that we are entertaining. Not everyone who is part of the community is secure and able to handle someone swearing at them, insulting their way of life, and otherwise putting down every visible aspect of their personality. Why this is incredibly irresponsible and abhorrent of you is in light of the many documented cases in which people have taken such insults to heart and get so depressed that they physically harm themselves.

If you want to be a responsible person and be able to communicate with people in a humane way that should have been the forefront of your mind.

More over, understanding that we are all human and sometimes we lose our cool, you have not once made a single attempt to express any sort of understanding on why you understand why what you said was wrong. Which to me sounds like a utter lack of remorse in any case.

Point Two: This entire phrase "Nausiated to get out his busy schedule to stop and commenting for me for absolutely no reason then to correct my own mistakes that I have made to my apology earlier."

How am I supposed to interpret that as anything other than sarcastic and entirely rude? Basically this is a back handed comment. On the one hand your asking me to accept your apology, but then you back hand it by stating that I'm doing things for "absolutely no reason" and then basically try to twist it around like I'm making you re-do this over and over. Which I have to say, if anyone is dragging this out it is you.

Point Three: The constant use of negatives. I point out the phrases "pointless debate", "as nothing to do", "strictly annoying him over a useless problem", "for absolutely no reason", "for such a small problem"

Are used in a context in which you are diminishing or dismissing instances where we pointed out what we expected from you, or what we asked you. You've basically discounted them as useless, and instead of heeding this advice, you've written nothing but a rambling and incoherent semi-apology. As for saying that it is "such a small problem" again, refer to my first point where I outline why it is such an important issue and why what you said could have had serious repercussions if you said it to the wrong person.

In summation you've basically said you're only sorry because you mouthed off at an admin, that you're only apologizing because you believe that you're annoying us, and that you don't see this as a big problem. You also haven't shown any sort of understanding as to why what you said was inappropriate. This clearly lacks any sort of remorse or sincerity. The way this is written basically says to me that you're just apologizing because you have to. It says to me that you probably didn't learn anything from this, and that while you'll probably not mouth off to anyone on this site, you'd probably do it some place else if you know you can get away with it. There is also not a single inkling that you are remorseful or that you understand that you should treat other people with the respect you expect others to treat you.

So is this really what you want me to pass along to the other admins to consider accepting?

Some friendly advice: If you really want to convey something that shows you really care, I think you need to put a little more time and thought into what you're going to say than immediately what comes off the top of your head when you log in and see that there is a message waiting for you. Perhaps you should go through all the messages I've posted on your talk page about what I'm looking for and take some notes. Then take some time to identify what is really important here and think about writing out something meaningful. I honestly think your biggest problem here is that you are rushing to get a response out that there is some disconnect between your ideas and what you ultimately end up communicating in writing.