- You begged for Ms. Marvel and you got me. Which is good because I got an adoring public and all she's got is crabs.
Appearing in "Half Man. Half Spider. All Amazing."
- The Redeemers
- Brooklyn Psychiatric Hospital, Brooklyn
Synopsis for "Half Man. Half Spider. All Amazing."
Gargan summarizes the events of the previous week: he started a gang-war between the Rolling Sevens and Park Avenue Players gangs to mess with Mayor Jameson's ratings. This backfired with Norman Osborn assigning him to assist the Mayor in clearing the streets of New York, and now the DB newspaper - which had previously been clamoring for an interview with Spider-Man - is treating him like Jameson's pet and holding him as an example of everything wrong with New York. Gargan, seated at Dexter Bennett's desk reading an unflattering article in the newspaper, vomits the corpse of a rabid squirrel onto the desk as payback, which Bennett discovers the following morning.
In Jameson's office, the mayor berates Spider-Man for his inaction regarding the gang-war, and Gargan shoots back that Jameson should be relying on the police. Jameson threatens to go to Osborn, and Gargan responds that if he does, then he'll have no-one to lay the blame on when things go wrong, while inwardly lamenting about not eating Jameson earlier. Their argument is interrupted by an intern, who states that Jameson has to prepare for the upcoming Big Apple Festival, and Jameson shanghais Gargan into accompanying him. At the meeting, Gargan perches on the ceiling and doodles pictures of Jameson having a heart attack, but Jameson's tirade is interrupted by his assistant, who informs him that Police Chief Ibanez wants to see him. Jameson orders Gargan to leave, and Gargan retorts that he may as well tell the police chief he won't be around to help fight crime. Ibanez stops him, saying that the police received a call regarding a nuclear bomb threat and that if anyone but Spider-Man arrived the caller would detonate it. Gargan demands backup and receives the entire NYPD, inwardly remarking that if it costs the city of New York an extra $2 million and makes Jameson's life even more miserable, letting him live is worth it. Arriving at the destination, Gargan remarks that he senses a trap, and wonders who would go to the trouble of calling him out with a nuclear bomb.
Inside the building, he is confronted by the Redeemers, but as the Redeemer launches into a speech he tells them to surrender to the cops and walks away. The Redeemer orders him to submit to a list of demands or they will kill him, and Gargan retorts he could simply kill them. The Redeemer reads the list, stipulating that Spider-Man issue a public apology to his victims, participate in anger management classes, and donate no less than 1000 hours to charity work. Gargan reiterates that he could simply kill them, but Doctor Everything approaches him, remarking that he finds Gargan fascinating since he's unable to predict anything about him. Eleven, impatient and angry, blasts Gargan point-blank with a sonic scream, briefly destabilizing the symbiote. Furious, Gargan retaliates by eating her, but as he turns to attack the rest of the group Doctor Everything replaces his mouth with a metal plate and Dementoid grabs him from behind. Gargan transforms his buttocks into a set of jaws, snarking that the symbiote can grow as many mouths as it needs, but before he can swallow Dementoid the Hippo body-slams him. Wolfram attempts to flee, but Gargan tosses the Hippo into him, burying them both under a pile of crates. Gargan then rips off Dementoid's arms and, rather than eat him, throws him into Doctor Everything and removes the metal plate. The Redeemer timidly remarks they got off on the wrong foot as Gargan picks him up, to which Gargan ominously replies they should get off on the right one.
Gargan exits the building dragging Doctor Everything, who he turns over to the police. At Brooklyn Psychiatric Hospital, a now armless and legless Redeemer, General Wolfram, and Dementoid discuss what to do now that Eleven and Hippo were eaten. Dementoid, traumatized, suggests giving up, but the Redeemer informs them that there is a Plan B: an envelope.
At city hall that evening, Jameson finds the envelope, which contains pictures of Spider-Man meeting with the gang members and devouring Eleven and Hippo. Jameson informs his assistant to leave and forget he ever saw the contents, triumphantly gloating that he finally has proof Spider-Man is a monster.
As the “partnership” between Spider-Man and Mayor J. Jonah Jameson gets worse by the day, learn a few of Mac Gargan's Spider-Man life lessons: if you bite someone's arm off, they will come back with a robot arm and try to kill you, as the Redeemer makes his move. Brian Reed and Chris Bachalo help you learn from Mac's mistakes.
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