Appearing in "Wreck the Malls with Hydra's Folly"
Featured Characters:
Supporting Characters:
- Beverly Switzler
- Wolverine (Dionysus Finster)
- Santa Claus
- Santa's Elves
- First Elf Tank Brigade
Antagonists:
- C.I.A (Copyright Infringement Agency)
- Judge Elmer Dwedd
- Hydra
Other Characters:
- Peter Porker (Named only)
- Iron Man (Named only)
- Donald Trump (Mentioned)
- Spider-Man (Mentioned)
- Gene Krupa (Mentioned)
- N.R.A. (Mentioned)
- King George III (Mentioned)
- Nazis (Mentioned)
- New York Mets (Mentioned)
- Yitzak
- Mei Ling
- Vito Claus
- Bubba Clause
- Santa Clara
- Claus Tse-Tung
- Sanity Clause
- Willy Lumpkin Claus
- Mrs. Claus (Mentioned)
Locations:
- United States of America
- North Pole
- Canada (Mentioned)
- Niagara Falls (Mentioned)
- China (Mentioned)
- Honduras (Mentioned)
- India (Mentioned)
Vehicles:
- Reindeer Bus
- Lemon Seed
Synopsis for "Wreck the Malls with Hydra's Folly"
On Christmas Eve, Howard was working at a video store in Cleveland and offered a customer the live-action "Spider-Man" movie that wasn't even in production yet. Howard claimed that the video release was "a little premature", causing Judge Elmer Dwedd of the C.I.A. (Copyright Infringement Agency) to attempt to arrest him. Before this could happen, Bev rushed inside of the store in a Santa costume and rushed out with him, claiming that there was a "catastrophe." Bev drove Howard to the Mondo Mega Mall and informed him that their store Santa was coming back from lunch break and his beard got stuck in escalator machinery.
As a result, Howard was forced to become the mall's new store Santa and have kids sit on his lap, much to his dismay. Then, Howard saw a seemingly blind child who claimed to have sold pencils on the street for ten days just to visit Santa. The child claimed that he would die soon and didn't want anything for himself, but wanted a nice present for his mother. Howard asked the child what he wanted and the child wanted a hug. While hugging Howard, the child stole his wallet and cigars, as well as Bev's candy canes, and Mei Ling's camera and jewelry. An angry Howard attempted to go after the boy, but Bev made him stay for the line of other children.
After many hours, Howard met his last child, Dionysius Finster, who asked for a candy cane and claimed that everyone kept cutting him in line. Howard revealed that he ran out of candy canes and Dionysius turned his back. Howard offered to do something for the Dionysius, who asked him to find his mother. Howard, Bev, and Mei Ling learned that Dionysius' parents both abandoned him. Then, an elf appeared before them and revealed that Hydra took over Santa's workshop. Howard, Bev, and Dionysius boarded a "Reindeer Bus", where they met other "Clauses" and rode for the North Pole. The Clauses armed themselves with rifles meant to be presents before attacking life-sized Hydra action figures.
A female member of Hydra was arguing with Santa Claus when Howard appeared and demanded to know what happened. Santa revealed that his workshop was the subject of Hydra's hostile takeover. Hydra planned to give only two gifts for Christmas: "correctly-sized" Hydra action figures for boys and a Hydra air-prancer for girls. Dionysius declared that Hydra was ruining Christmas, which was all that he had left, making him angry and attack the woman from Hydra. Howard convinced Santa Claus to take back Christmas. Santa Claus, the elves, Howard, and the other Clauses were able to defeat Hydra and the elves were able to meet the toy quota, afterwards.
Sometime later, Howard found the child who stole his wallet and cigars and kicked him before reclaiming both.