Magneeto (Earth-9047)

History

Silver Age

Magneeto was a Mutie, born with super-powers comparable to other comic-book characters, and a mysterious S-factor in his genetic code that phenominally [sic.] increased the sales of issues in which he appeared —without it, he would be simply another comic-book character. However, muties gifted with the S-Factor were regularly feared, hated and spat upon by common humans,^[5] as well as being prone to angst and internal conflicts, sometimes even for the sake of it.^[4] Magneeto might have an evil twin, Evil Magneat-o.^[1]

During his life, Magneeto fathered two children: Pimento, later known as the superhero Slicksilver, and Wanda, later known as the superheroine Scarlett Wench.^[1]

In the 1960s, during the silver age of comics, Magneeto was hired as the staff villain, opposed to the then-recent mutie group then-known as the Echs-Men.^[6] Self-proclaimed a stupor-villain,^[7] Magneeto led the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants,^[6] aka Brotherhood of Sleazy Mutants^[1] —including his minion the Tremulous Toadstool^[6] and Master Slime^[1]— in constant attacks against the Echs-Men during the first thirty issues of the series… because his contract stipulated that he should appear in each and every issue. Magneeto disrespected the Echs-Men, believing them to be such an irrelevant super-team that no-one would miss them if he finally succeeded in destroying them, and giving their series a life expectancy of only 60 issues.^[6]

However, Magneeto decided that the readers of the series deserved something more original than a new attack of his Brotherhood; thus, he created the robots called Sentimentals and sent them to find and destroy the Echs-Men; later, Magneeto expected to make the robots sing Motown Tunes for him. Magneeto also made other dated references while briefing his team. Unfortunately, the Sentimentals were unable to identify mutants in the streets of 1960s Greenwich Village because everybody there were a bunch of freaks of weirdos, so no-one could pinpoint a mutie.^[6]

Not one to give up, Magneeto joined forces with other villains in jointed ventures against the super-heroes of the time: He allied with Doctor Doof to oppose the Revengers, the Fantastical Four, the Bulk and Spidey-Man. However, Doof's metallic armor reacted badly to Magneeto's magnetic power: Doof was accidentally captured by his ally Magneeto, leading to a widespread laughter among the heroes.^[8]

Magneeto then attacked the Echs-Men with a team of first-class stupor-villains including his reality's versions of the Green Goblin, the Juggernaut, the Mole Mensch and the Red Skulker. The evildoers had several advantages, including their number, but in the end they were defeated when the big-footed Least of the Echs-Men used his secret power: Mutant foot odor. The villains retreated, and the Echs-Men were unhappy to stay.^[8]

But Magneeto would finally get the upper hand in his enemies: The Echs-Men, the Fantastical Four and the Revengers spent much of their time fighting each other, while at the same time neglecting and being disrespectful to the female superheroines in the teams. The superheroines, Inevitable Woman of the Fantastical Four, Marble Girl of the Echs-Men and Scarlett Wench of the Revengers, looked for prospective romantic relationships otherwhere, and found these in Doctor Doof, Magneeto and Kranky, three eager stupor-villains who treated the girls respectfully, as ladies and their equals. The villains admitted to themselves that these three girls were, at that point, their only choice as the only superheroines in the Marvel Universe. Magneeto remembered that Aunt May and the Wisp were their only choice should their current romances failed, and Kranky booked his turn on Aunt May in that case.^[9]

The good guy

After the end of the Silver Age, Magneeto left stupor-villainy,^[7] changed his uniform and became a well-liked good guy.^[1] In the Watchman's opinion, this was simply a plot to trick Santa Claus, so that Magneeto would receive the Super-Powers action figures he did not own for Christmas.^[10] Magneeto also replaced Professor Ecchs as the leader of the Echs-Men, by then renamed X-Persons—although at that point Magneeto would rather have a job as a cyclotron.^[4]

Magneeto decided to train the X-Persons, including the younger team, in the Dingy Room, while he monitored their activity. One of the younger X-Persons, Smegma, noticed that her partner Slug was having an anguished thought balloon instead of sweating and fighting like the others, and she told Magneeto. Magneeto consulted the time and decided that it was a good moment for everyone to have some suffering and conflicts. So he gave the order, and the X-Persons started with their dreadful, Weltschmerz-filled moments.^[4]

Meanwhile, the supervillain Scarecrow was staging an evil scheme: Tricking the X-Persons and the Offengers (previously known as the Revengers) so that each team will believe that the other is being mind-controlled by a villain, prompting the teams to fight each other and leaving the Scarecrow to perform evil deeds. Bipsyclelocke of the X-Persons received a psychic message blaming the Puppet Mister of mind-controlling the Offengers, but Sturm-and-Drang of the X-Persons suspected foul play, as the Offengers were heroes. Magneeto decided to ponder the possible implications of every alternative by tossing a coin. Following the chance result, Magneeto not only ordered the X-Persons to attack the Offengers, but he also took an spectacular pose calling the attention of Wolfstain and Sam'n'ball.^[4]

Magneeto gathered the X-People and attacked the Offengers Mansion, just as the Offenger called Dr. Droolid was warning his partners of a possible X-Person attack. While Magneeto made a great entrance hurting the Offengers, the Offengers soon regrouped and started a counter-attack. Shouting "Offengers Ostensible!", the Wisp pricked Magneeto's ass, making him jump. The brawl attracted other superteams, including the Fantastical Four and Alfalfa Flight, and the all-out battle accidentally defeated the Scarecrow. Eventually Chaplain America, leader of the Offengers, suggested to stop fighting and instead talk and reason with each other, but the heroes kept on fighting, thinking that it would increase their comic-books' sales.^[4]

Soon after this event, Magneeto was summoned to the Moon by the Watchman. The Watchman believed that Magneeto was still a villain and made him appear in his traditional, red villain uniform. The Watchman explained Magneeto that he wanted Magneeto to stage a third Secret War to counter the Digressing Cosmo's Legendary Crisis of the Infinite Millenium—The Watchman omitted that he had just interviewed and discarded two other villains, Doctor Doof and Galacticus, and that he didn't want to call the Behinder again. Magneeto was uninterested in this until he could make the Watchman pronounce his name correctly, "Magnooto", instead of "Magnutto". Magneeto even grabbed the Watchman's lips with his fingers to try and make him correct his speech. Sick at this, the Watchman sent Magneeto back to Earth and, reluctantly, summoned the Behinder.^[10]

Magneeto's daughter the Scarlett Wench had married the robot Vizzion and they moved to Leonia, a hamlet of New Jersey, where she revealed that she was pregnant. Wanting to celebrate both this and their twelve-issue limited series, the Scarlett Wench invited her relatives to a party at their new home. Magneeto (then called Magneat-o) arrived, surprising the Vizzion who still thought he was a bad guy; Magneeto corrected him, explaining that he was not only good but also well-liked; besides, he was Vizzion's father-in-law, so he expected Vizzion to dislike him anyway. Insisting in his good ethics, Magneeto used his powers to raise Squeaky, the cat of Vizzion's neighbour Linda LaDueña.^[1]

Just when the party was waning, they were interrupted by several villains including the original Brotherhood of Sleazy Mutants led by Magneat-o's evil twin, and several other enemies. Vizzion and the Scarlett Wench decided to fight with the uninvited guests so that their guests wouldn't be bothered, and the villains were defeated. This was excellent because it rekindled interest in the party.^[1]

Mutant Beach Party Saga

The X-Persons were then harassed by the Ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies—other super-powered heroes in the Marvel Universe who, lacking the mutant S-Factor that increased the sales of their comic-book series, wanted to obliterate the X-Persons in an attempt to get rid of their competition—. The X-Persons, including Magneeto, were forced to hide from them in a small beach house, although they make sure to save the world thrice since breakfast before that; there, they had a party and a lot of anguished thought and speech balloons.^[5] However, the ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies found them and sent several waves of other enemies to weaken the X-People before the Consortium attacked themselves.^[11] The Justice Junta attacked first, but were quickly defeated; and then the X-People were visited by Slicksilver and the Scarlett Wench, who wanted to tell them that the ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies was looking for the X-People with evil intention, and to get a crossover appearance.^[5]

The X-People decided to explore the forest surrounding the house, looking for the ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies. During the search, Illyana Rasputina, Sam'n'ball and Wolfstain found a puppy and Wolfstain asked Magneeto if they could keep it. However, Magneeto was adamant about accepting only muties in the X-Persons. Rasputina reasoned that maybe the dog's parents were human, which would make him a mutie, and Magneeto then agreed to keep the animal. He rejected the proposed name Muffin, instead choosing to call him Carnivorax.^[5]

The X-People was attacked by the Hotrodders, but nobody important died in the attack. Then, they were found by The Living Humongous Menhir, who claimed to have discovered the catalyst that caused enormous sales when combined with the S-Factor: Death of main characters. The giant Menhir used his sheer size and a foot to throw all the X-People from the top of a cliff.^[5] During the fall, the young X-Person Non-Entity (previously known as Slug) accidentally fell before the other muties, so he was crushed under their weight and died, but saved their lives. However, some of the X-Persons decided that they had died and had to move to Australia for that reason. This caused a schism, with some of the main X-Persons leaving. Magneeto did not leave, remaining behind with characters such as the Mutie Wanna-Bes, Captain British and Dusk Kitten.^[11]

Magneeto and his X-Persons fought the Four Horseman Made of Ol'Paper Clips and then took a part in the Ablutionary War mostly to encourage their readers to buy separate limited series. They were joined by the returning Australia team, who had been told that the fight against the ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies was imminent. Dusk Kitten, still angry at them, created her own team X-Pialidocious, which did not affect Magneeto at all.^[11]

Halfshot of the X-Persons had been trying to find who was the ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies for the whole party, but no-one could explain him because they were always interrupted by an enemy attack. Seeing his plight, Magneeto was glad to start explaining that some super-heroes have tried to get the S-Factor; as far as he knew, Clunk and Dagnabbit had officially applied to become muties and the Bower Brats were pretending to be. Before Magneeto could expand any further, the evil Readers attacked and, once they got rid of them, the Watchit (previously known as the Watchman) appeared to announce the arrival of the ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies. The X-Persons understood that the previous fights were intended only to weaken the X-Persons before this final fight, and ran to prepare for the attack. The ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies attacked them in the beach,^[11] but the X-Persons, including Magneeto, survived.^[7]

Further activities

After this event, Magneeto (then called Magnuto) returned to his own red uniform. He also considered pairing with another mutie, and finally he was paired with the metallic X-Person Collasalus. This was unfortunate, as Magneeto automatically attracted the huge mass of Collosalus and was crushed between a wall and a mutie. Magneeto was unhappy at this.^[7]

Magneeto frequented Bud's Sud, a drinking-and-show locale^[12] in New York City where several super-powered beings went for relax after a long day's job. The owner, Bud, happened to owe his rent to the landlord, the demonic My-Fistoe. To get the money, Bud's waitress Catsy prepared a charity benefit show, and several of the usual patrons, including Magneeto, offered to act. Magneeto joined other X-People including Clipclops, Halfshot, Kleenex, Least and Earth-9047's version of Havok, and together they danced sang a mutant-themed song. Along with other superheroes, they raised the money more or less in time; the final line is that it worked.^[12]

But then, apparently, Magneeto returned to his previous evil ways and, using the name Magnet-Toe, worked along with Doctor Doomed (previously known as Doctor Doof). Scott Lobdell, impersonating Professor Ecchs, had gathered a team of little-known super-heroes, the Obscurity Legion (including Al Eagle, American Gull, Sham-Luck, Surefire and Pal-o'mine), and the new team defeated Doomed and Magnet-Toe before recruiting some new members and entering for the first time in their own secret headquarters. However, all this might be an alternate reality happening only in Lobdell's dreams^[13]—which would have make it the work of the Living Nighty-Nightmare.^[14]

For the Christmas Day of 1990,^[15] Magneto presented Professor Ecchs with comb and a hair-dryer, mocking at the Professor's baldness. The Professor disliked the present.^[16]

The Visionary was still unhappy at Magneeto (by then called Magneto): After giving a party, the Visionary and his super-hero friends decided to go and fight injustice, and the Visionary prompted them to hand Magneeto an anvil. The super-heroes reminded the Visionary that Magneeto was a good guy, but the Visionary insisted that Magneeto was nevertheless is father-in-law, thus deserving reprisal.^[2]

Powers and Abilities

Powers

Magneeto had magnetic powers^[7] that allowed him to grab metallic-armored characters with a single hand.^[8] He could also use his powers to fly or float in the air and to magnetically raise cats in the air, something that cats dislike.^[1]

Abilities

Magneeto claimed to be the creator of the robots known as Sentimentals, although he did not specify in which aspect: He might have designed the robotics, or he could have financed or managed the IT team that built them, or he might be simply moving non-technological chunks of metal using his powers.^[6]

Magneeto is also romantic when courting a girl, something that girls find nice.^[9] He can also sing and dance,^[12]

Magneeto can pose spectacularly, Jack Kirby-style, increasing the size of his hand while doing so.^[4]

Weaknesses

Magneeto's magnetic powers were strong enough to automatically attract big masses of metal —such as the armored form of Collasalus, which would led to Magneeto being crushed under Collasalus' weight.^[7] When angry and obssessed, Magneeto's powers uncontrolled and small metal items (paperclips, forks, pins, screws) got stuck to his helmet.^[6]

Paraphernalia

Equipment

Wrist watch.^[4] Sometimes he holds twin magnets in his hands.^[10]

Notes

Magneeto's name seems to be difficult to pronounce, with several people pronouncing it differently. Magneeto himself pronounced it Magnooto and insistently corrected the Watchman when he called him Magnutto.^[10] Magneeto nonetheless accepted Smegma calling him Mag-nee-to, and other junior X-Persons knew him using other mispronounciations such as Magnehto (by Magnavox), Magnayto (by the Somespots), Magnutto (by Sam'n'ball), Magnougat (by Illyana Rasputin), McNugget (by Scottish Wolfstain) and Snookums (by Oarlock).^[4] Later, Magneeto refered to himself as Magneat-o,^[1] the narrator called him Magnuto,^[7] and his enemies called him Magnet-Toe.^[13] Sometimes he was even called Magneto.^[8]

Links and References

• 7 Appearances of Magneeto (Earth-9047)
• Minor Appearances of Magneeto (Earth-9047)
• Media Magneeto (Earth-9047) was Mentioned in
• 7 Images featuring Magneeto (Earth-9047)
• Quotations by or about Magneeto (Earth-9047)
• Character Gallery: Magneeto (Earth-9047)

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Footnotes