Back Cover Pinup
Why is it always me everyone comes ta for help?! I'm only human! It just ain't fair! It just... AIN'T FAIR! Thing
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Thing walks into an alley, and happens upon a mugging. A young man named Charlie Carcrash, is attacking an older, homeless woman, Elsie Gertz. Thing grabs a garbage can and jams it over the man's head. The man runs away, and the woman thanks him for rescuing her. She shows him where she lives, a small, makeshift shack made up of a dumpster, some wood, and cardboard. He gives her some money to stay in the hotel across the street, and walks away. As he walks, he thinks about how difficult the woman's life must be, and he decides that he doesn't have it so bad after all. He starts to go home, and cuts through an alley. Suddenly, a blinding light flashes before his eyes, and he sees a portal appear before him, and in the portal, Doctor Strange speaks to him, saying that he needs the Thing's help. Thing strips down to his speedo and jumps through the portal, and after going through, he lands at the feet of a group of monsters. Thing asks Strange what's going on, and the Sorcerer Supreme says that these demons are his jailers, and he explains what happened.
Doctor Strange, after banishing the Hulk to the Crossroads, sensed a spark of Bruce Banner's intellect in Hulk, and he summoned his fellow Defenders members, along with Hulk, to his Sanctum Sanctorum, and he kept Hulk under control with a somnambulant spell. He left the others in the sitting room, and went to his study, where he attempted to reconstruct Banner's intelligence, or at least jumpstart it, inside Hulk's head. Someone snuck in the room, and knocked him out. When he cam to, he was imprisoned in a dimension, surrounded by extraterrestrial demons, and his old enemy, Xandu, who had stolen his Eye of Agamotto, and he planned to couple it with the Ruby of Domination, to own the world. He tells Strange that the Ruby could only control the mind of one person at a time, so he used it to control the mind of one Defenders member. He threatened that he'd have the world enslaved by noon tomorrow. Xandu left, and Strange used his mastery of the mystic arts to send a strained, last minute plea for help to the Thing.
Thing realizes that Strange expects him to free him, but Thing, angry that Strange just expected to him to fight these demons and free him on a whim, gets angry and begins ranting about how everyone always turns to him for help, and how he's tired of all the fighting and being everyone's punching bag. Thing suddenly punches one of the demons into the air saying that that's just how things are, though. They all pile onto him, but he easily knocks them off. The lead demon attacks him, but he wallops him back. Another demon takes a shot at him, but he catches the monster's fist and flips him into several others. Thing pounds the ground, setting many of the demons off-balance, and they fall off of the rock platform that Strange's prison is on. The last demon stabs Thing in the back with a spear, and he wraps it around the demon's neck, and frees Strange. Thing asks if Strange can teleport him back to the Baxter Building, but he says that he still has need of Thing's powers, as Thing will have to hold which ever member of the Defenders Xandu has taken control, of at bay, while Strange gets the ruby. strange teleports them both back to Earth, and they head back to the Sanctum Sanctorum. they go in, and Thing asks who the controlled hero is. Strange says that he may not like it, but Thing persists. They go into a room and find Xanadu with the ruby, and he's protected by one angry, mind-controlled, Hulk.
- Thing is disheartened over the fact that Johnny Storm is dating his girlfriend, Alicia Masters. This started in Fantastic Four Vol 1 265. Thing found out about their relationship in Fantastic Four Vol 1 277. Alicia began dating Johnny because Thing was away on Battleworld. He arrived there in Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars Vol 1 1. He decided to stay in Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars Vol 1 12, and didn't return until Fantastic Four Vol 1 277.
- The Hulk was banished to the Crossroads by Doctor Strange in Incredible Hulk Vol 1 300. Excluding this and the next issue, he returned to Earth in Incredible Hulk Vol 1 313 and Alpha Flight Vol 1 28.
- Includes a one-page Editori-Al comic strip.
- The 'Vess Pocket Portfolio' is drawn by Charles Vess.
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