Ladies and gentlemen, this is Morty Quirt... not the Morty Quirt who was selfish, mean and inconsiderate, but a new Morty Quirt! I want to apologize to the world... HEAR ME! LISTEN! This is important... I MUST TALK TO YOU! 
Appearing in "There Grows a Rose"
Featured Characters:
- Mr. Mooney (First appearance)
Supporting Characters:
- Mooney's Roses
- Unnamed Psychiatrist
Other Characters:
- Mr. Casey
- Two unnamed customers
- Unidentified Police Department
- Unnamed Sergeant
- Ryan
Races and Species:
Locations:
- Earth-616
- Earth
- United States of America
- Mr. Mooney's Curio Store
- United States of America
- Earth
Synopsis for "There Grows a Rose"
A man whose only friends are flowers know that he is poor and steal for him until the prison hypnotist removes his love for them and he can no longer grow them.
Appearing in "The Salesman"
Featured Characters:
- Alfonso Littenlauter (First appearance)
Supporting Characters:
- Connor Brush Company (First appearance)
- Unnamed District Manager
- Mr. R. Connor
Other Characters:
- Unnamed Customer
Races and Species:
Locations:
- Earth-616
- Earth
- United States of America
- Connor Brush Company Building (First appearance)
- Alfonso Littenlauter's Home
- United States of America
- Earth
Items:
- Little Handy Wonder-Gem (First appearance)
Synopsis for "The Salesman"
- Synopsis not yet written
Appearing in "The Strange Valley"
Featured Characters:
- Sam (Native American)
Supporting Characters:
- New York Tourists
- Jim
- Numerous unnamed tourists
Other Characters:
- Unnamed Native American God
Races and Species:
- Humans
- Goblins (Mentioned)
- Native American Gods
Locations:
- Earth-616
- Earthspace
- Earth
- United States of America
- New York (Referenced)
- Strange Valley (First appearance)
- United States of America
- Earth
- Heaven (Invoked)
- Earthspace
Synopsis for "The Strange Valley"
White tourists scoff at legends of Indian gods at play in the strange valley...until they see one.
Appearing in "Mr. Meek"
Featured Characters:
- Edgar Meek (First appearance)
Supporting Characters:
- Mrs. Meek
- Edgar Meek's Daughter
- Edgar Meek's Son
- Joe (Barber)
Other Characters:
- Mr. Kilberry
- Mr. Evans
- Mrs. Humphry
- Mrs. Dolan
- Samson (Mentioned)
Races and Species:
Locations:
- Earth-616
- Earthspace
- Heaven (Invoked)
Items:
- Joe's Hair Tonic (First appearance)
Synopsis for "Mr. Meek"
A timid bald individual tries a tonic that puts hair on his head and also makes him strong. He goes around attracting attention, but he doesn't want it, so he shaves the hair off and loses his strength.
Appearing in "Man in the Dark!"
Featured Characters:
- "Frank Jones" (Alien Agent)
Supporting Characters:
- Unnamed Man (Martha's Husband)
- Martha
- Katie (Martha's Daughter)
- Billy (Martha's Son)
Other Characters:
- Santa Claus (Mentioned)
Races and Species:
Locations:
Events:
Synopsis for "Man in the Dark!"
An alien is going to send a message to his people that Earth must be destroyed due to the coldness of its people until his pleasant experience with a family on Christmas day changes his mind.
Appearing in "On the Air..."
Featured Characters:
- Morty Quirt (First appearance)
Supporting Characters:
- Bill Sawyer (First appearance) (Morty's Manager)
Other Characters:
- Numerous unnamed studio audience members
- Numerous unnamed studio officials
- Mrs. Quirt
Races and Species:
Locations:
Synopsis for "On the Air..."
A radio comedian signs a contract for big money and decides to take the opportunity to tell all his listeners what he thinks of them.
Notes
- "There Grows a Rose" is reprinted in Crypt of Shadows #12.
- "The Salesman" is reprinted in World of Fantasy #5.
- "The Strange Valley" is reprinted in Beware #8.
- "Man in the Dark!" is reprinted in Weird Wonder Tales #14.