- To paraphrase an old army buddy: I do so love it when a plan comes together.
- -- Patch
Appearing in "If It Ain't Broke..."
- Karma (Xi'an Coy Manh)
- Jessica Drew
- Lindsay McCabe
- Police Chief Tai
- Tyger Tiger (Jessán Hoan)
- Mr. Fixit (Bruce Banner)
- General Coy (Nguyen Ngoc Coy)
- Kobe (First appearance)
- Mr. Liu (First appearance)
- Shen (First appearance)
Races and Species:
Synopsis for "If It Ain't Broke..."
Continued from last issue...
At the Sovereign Hotel, the Hulk comes out of the shower and is furious to find that someone has replaced all of his suits and stuffed his suitcases with torn purple pants, with a note saying "We know who you are! Get out of town!", unknown to the Hulk this is the first of many torments by Logan. This is the first torment orchestrated by the mutant in order to manipulate him into wrecking Nguyen Coy's operations in the Madripoor crime scene. Joe Fixit is furious and vows to get back at whoever played this joke on him.
That evening, while Patch, Jessica Drew, General Coy, his niece Karma, Lindsay McCabe, Tyger Tiger and Captain Tai of the Madripoor police enjoy a night of music at the Princess Bar, things livened up by the arrival of the Hulk. When he smashes through the door, O'Donnell is furious until the Hulk intimidates him and then pays for the damage. Knowing that Patch is the man to go to for information in Madripoor, and unaware that it was he who put all the purple pants in his hotel room goes to him seeking information on Coy. Everyone believes a fight is about to break out and start placing bets, but much to everyone's surprise, Patch agrees to help the Hulk out. Taking him outside, Hulk tells him that before he goes after the man he's been hired to look for, he wants to know what he deals in. Before they can go anywhere a Madripet truck zooms by splashing the Hulk. In a fury the Hulk bounds over to the truck and smashes it, realizing too late that it's carrying waste. With is suit ruined, Patch decides to further torment the Hulk by providing him the "only" clothes in his size, a pair of purple pants.
Patch takes him to a massage parlor that is really a front for the slave trade and convinces the Hulk to help him bust out all the captured women. They rough up the establishments operators, and when the owner tries to give Logan trouble for the incident, the Hulk smashes up his operation and warns the flesh peddler not to get him angry. Going back to his hotel room, the Hulk is tricked by Logan to wait until dawn. When he reverts back into Bruce Banner, Logan makes sure it's Banner, not the Hulk that reaps the spoils of his rescuing the women. When the Hulk returns at night he is angry that Banner managed to have the fun and not him, playing right into Logan's hand.
That night, Logan takes him on another bogus trip, this time tracking him into going to a shrine right above the largest Cocaine processing plant in Madripoor. Suspicious of Patch, the Hulk sends him first, however Patch manages to slip away and use his claws to cut through the floor and send the Hulk crashing into the processing plant. When it's guards attack him, he dismantles the place and sends the guards fleeing. When Logan explains to him what he did, the Hulk realizes that he's been set up. Before he can go anything further, Coy shows up with is subordinates Roughhouse and Bloodscream, furious that the man sent out to help his operations have done nothing but tear them down. When the Hulk realizes that Coy is a crime lord, he realizes he was tricked into helping mobsters and refuses to do anything crooked since his employer Berengetti doesn't deal in illegal operations.
Furious of being used as a pawn, Fixit asks Logan how he is going to stop him from turning Madripoor upside down and take over. Logan explains to him that half the day is sunlight making him vulnerable when he turns into Bruce Banner. The Hulk doesn't like this and after decking Patch in the face, agrees to leave. The following night, Patch organizes a flight for the Hulk to get back to the United States, giving him an opportunity to play a final joke on the Hulk: Telling him he's flying east to enjoy the all evening flight. He fools Hulk into taking a flight going west, in the direction of the rising sun. When the Hulk realizes it, it's far too late and he turns back into Bruce Banner cursing Patch's name.
Appearing in "A Wolverine Gallery"
Synopsis for "A Wolverine Gallery"
Pinup art on back cover.
|Like this? Let us know!|